Sunday, November 14, 2010

November 13

November 13 comes and goes each year without much of a thought to most people. But not to me.

November 13, 2003 was the day I lost the eleven week old baby I was carrying. Miscarriage was something that happened to other people, not to me. I had already had four pregnancies, resulting in four healthy babies, so I automatically assumed that my fifth pregnancy would yield the same. Sadly, it didn't.

I was very surprised at the fact that I was having a miscarriage. I was also very surprised at how much it hurt. It was, in fact, much like being in labor. I left the hospital feeling like I do after I have a baby, just, without the baby. I think the saddest part of the whole ordeal was being wheeled out with nothing in my arms. My arms literally ached.

It's been seven years. I really only dwell on what "might have been" two days a year. November 13, the day he or she died, and May 30, the day he or she would have been born. I still miss that baby. I wonder if it was a boy or girl and what he or she would have been like.

But I take great comfort in knowing that he/she lived every day of the life God had planned. I don't understand it, but I trust Him.

One day I will meet my baby and hold him or her and together we will worship the One who gave us life. What a day that will be!


Anonymous said...

Hugs from your Mom on this day. Love you & miss you ever so much.
Love, Mom

Jenna said...

Thank you for sharing, Elizabeth. I didn't realize you had suffered a miscarriage. I'm sorry for your aching heart and arms, but rejoice knowing that you are so confident that our Father is in control and you will hold know your baby one day!

Angie Greenfield said...

Elizabeth, I can not offer understanding from personal experience, yet please know my heart aches for your loss and also will rejoice with you one day when this baby meets you in heaven. Much love to you. xoxoxox

Stacey Dobecki said...

thanks for your post, through the tears...thanks.